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“Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.” From Desiderata written by Max Ehrmann in the 1920s

With all the current focus on “being all we can be” and “manifesting all of our desires” many of us feel the burden of perfection looming. Even the adage about striving for excellence rather than perfection can be cold comfort.

Much of the rhetoric of the life coaching movement, still in its infancy I’m afraid, frequently places unabashed attention on the attainment of what is often just out of reach. Somewhat secretly, I find the whole affair exhausting.

What about the somewhat unsexy business of just being? Certainly, as human beings we want to unfold. We want to love more, extend more, express more and connect more. But, an overextended reach towards something we think we should have or be is an exercise in perfectionism and self flagellation.

A wholesome gentle discipline untrammeled by anxiety is often the healthy middle road that feels natural and easy to journey along. A fear based motivation may assure us the attainment of that “thing”; however, its attainment often leaves us unhappy and strangely unfulfilled. The more we mature the more we find that it is really about the process or the journey not about perfectionistic outcomes. Most of the time, the satisfaction of outcomes is too fleeting to derive any ongoing pleasure from. Seeking perfection in forms will always elude us in the long run because by their very nature forms are ephemeral.

Perfection is just an idea that doesn’t feed our soul. In fact, the push to perfection tends to drive us to a certain kind of madness. Perfection and authenticity seem to be at opposite end of the spectrum. What is often most beautiful, at least in my mind’s eye, is that so called imperfect bit of life that tears our heart open and motivates us to love and embrace it all.

© 2010 Jeanine Marie Austin, Ph.D., C.Ht.
Simply Divine Solutions
www.SimplyDivineSolutions.com